Life with Gamma

This episode involves Gamma. Enjoy!

I: Don’t tickle his eyes!
I think I was worried that someone’s cornea would be scratched. Sometimes the kids don’t know how to be gentle.

Gamma: When my head gets bigger it will look like your head
I: Yes, when you grow up, that should be the case.
Fans of Space Ghost Cartoon Planet should be thinking of a certain skit right now…

Gamma: Mommy, I put my finger in the plug and it didn’t hurt.
Thanks a lot, whichever children’s book had the lesson about not touching outlets. Now my child will doubt any other warnings we may give him. I can guess his future:
“Look, I’m reading in the dark and my eyes don’t hurt!”
“Hey, I ran with scissors and nothing happened!”
“I played ball in the street and no cars hit me.”
It’s all about risk, son, and probabilities.

Scene: the dinner table, with everyone eating nicely
Gamma: I making water!
I look over and see that he has a fistful of ground beef and he is squeezing it so that the grease drips on the table. Exclamations and a hasty clean-up commence.

You have crowned the year with Your bounty, And Your paths drip with fatness.

Psalm 65:11

Barbed Wire

No explanation necessary:

Barbra Streisand and Barbara Walter take the place of sharp barbs on strings of barbed wire

Therefore, behold, I will hedge up her way with thorns, And I will build a wall against her so that she cannot find her paths.

Hosea 2:6

Super Attitude

In case you missed this exchange after the halftime show of the Super Bowl, I have noted what Cris Collinsworth and Al Michaels had to say about it. It seems they missed the first part of the show.

Cris Collinsworth and Al Michaels call Super Bowl XLVI and discuss the halftime show

Transcript:
Cris: Who was that warm-up act for the Super Bowl halftime show?
Al: I don’t know, but he had a bad attitude
Cris: That’s true – he was being such a pre-Madonna!

Thus they were haughty and committed abominations before Me. Therefore I removed them when I saw it.

Ezekiel 16:50

Sherman Act, Section 2

There are versions of Monopoly for all sorts of things. It has more variations than you can count, it seems.

First it was the cities: Monopoly Chicago Edition, Monopoly Denver Edition, etc.
Next it was the colleges: Michiganopoly, Gatoropoly, Stanfordopoly, etc.
Then it was the movies: Monopoly Indiana Jones Edition, Monopoly Star Trek Edition, Monopoly Three Stooges Edition, etc.

I thought that was it for the variations.

Then I saw this:

the game Monopoly - Supply Chain Edition

details of the box for the game Monopoly - Supply Chain Edition

I’m sure that might be fun for some people. But then I got to thinking – when would you actually play this?

If you play this at home, then I’d think you need better ways to relax. Don’t bring work stuff home with you. Plus, where would you find other people with whom you could play the game?

And if you’re playing this at work, where the other people would appreciate the game, then you obviously don’t have enough to do and are risking getting your hours cut.

Either way, I can see why I never knew about the Supply Chain Edition of Monopoly before.

Therefore because you impose heavy rent on the poor And exact a tribute of grain from them, Though you have built houses of well-hewn stone, Yet you will not live in them; You have planted pleasant vineyards, yet you will not drink their wine.

Amos 5:11

A Saturday in the Life

Here is a summary of a recent Saturday – a day in the life of Some Guy. You could consider it to be somewhat typical.

  • Get awakened by a child
  • Get breakfast for the kids
  • Say goodbye to wife, who is off to brunch with a friend
  • Acquiesce to the kids’ pleas to watch Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood
  • Get Delta down for his nap
  • Start organizing clutter on my nightstand
  • Find an escrow overpayment refund check from mortgage company
  • Read the fine print and find out that the check expires on Sunday, when the banks are not open.
  • Look at the clock and see that it is 11:30 and the wife has the minivan so there’s no way I’m getting to the bank before noon.
  • Find out that the banks are now open until 1:00 on Saturdays.
  • Call wife and find out she has just left brunch and will be home by noon.
  • Breathe a sigh of relief and a thank-you prayer.
  • Start lunch for the kids
  • Eat my own lunch
  • Go to the bank
  • Play outside in the snow with the older kids
  • Make hot chocolate for them. Do not forget the marshmallows.
  • Replace toilet seat. (This took over an hour because the old bolts had rusted over and needed to be cut off. Have you tried running a Dremel tool on the underside of a toilet seat hinge with only one foot of clearance to the wall? I went through all of my cutoff wheels – the bolt released as the last cutoff wheel broke.)
  • Watch baby and set table as wife prepares dinner
  • Eat dinner
  • Clean dining room
  • Watch DVD of some episodes of The Muppet Show season 1 with the whole family
  • Put Gamma to bed
  • Feed Delta
  • Watch Delta crawl around
  • Put Alpha and Beta to bed
  • Walk Delta around until he’s drowsy
  • Put Delta to bed
  • Say goodnight to wife
  • Internet time for myself, until I’m drowsy. And then some.

Indeed, if a man should live many years, let him rejoice in them all, and let him remember the days of darkness, for they will be many. Everything that is to come will be futility.

Ecclesiastes 11:8

Discerning Media

I’m writing about censorship today.

A couple weeks ago the internet was ablaze with SOPA and PIPA and other acronyms. Everyone rallied together and defeated the big bad bills that would have let government direct who can say what.

I’m not talking about that kind of censorship.

I censor what comes into my house, what my kids see and hear.

Maybe a better word would be filter.

Or discern.

It is important for parents to protect their children.

People use the term shelter like it is a bad thing. Shelter is like anything else – too much of it is bad, and too little of it is bad too. Kids need to be sheltered for a while, until they are strong enough to withstand that from which the shelter was protecting them.

I like the analogy of the greenhouse. Why do seedlings need to be in a greenhouse? The greenhouse is there to protect them from the elements until they have grown enough to handle them.
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Bolic

Inspired by yesterday’s post about bola, I am writing today about bolic.

“What is bolic?” you may ask.

It’s a word. Here it is:

image showing the word bolic

That’s the standard word. Now comes the quiz part, where I draw bolic differently.

What are the words that each of the following drawings represent?

A.

image showing the word parabolic

B.

image showing the word metabolic

C.

image showing the word anabolic

D.

image showing the word symbolic

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