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My Own Skates

My parents took us out for my birthday. We went to dinner and I picked out my present. Since Beta likes to ice skate, I’ve taken him a few times. He has his own skates, but I always had to rent mine.

Until now.

I have my own skates. I don’t need to wait in line at the rental counter. I no longer need to give them my shoes as collateral. And I won’t be worried that I get the rental skates with the one shoelace that’s too short. I am free!

Well, somewhat free. I still have to pay the admission fee.

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I’ve already listed tips to be prepared for a trip to the maternity ward. But what about after the baby has been born? That’s what today’s list will cover.

• Pack a zip-up fleece or warm sweatshirt. And warm socks. They keep those rooms pretty cold. These items are not for you – they are for your wife. And it must be a zip-up shirt thingy. The pullover types do not play nicely with the IV lines.
• Don’t get flowers before you go to the hospital, but do get them before she leaves the hospital. The sooner after the baby is born, the better. One trick is that, since the hospital doesn’t feed the dad, you have to go out and get your own meal. While you’re out getting your food, buy some flowers and bring them back to the room. With some extra fries.
• Make sure your wife has her own pillow. The hospital pillows are not comfortable. If you’re going to sleep on the rocking chair or couch or whatever furniture the hospital has in the recovery room, then make sure you take your own pillow too.
• Don’t forget the baby’s name. This is not a problem for the first child, but I kept calling Delta by Gamma’s name. I have corrected this by calling all my children “Buddy”.

And one more thing:

• Right after the baby is born, it’s best to focus your attention on the baby. Get some pictures, etc. You really do not want to see what the doctor is doing anymore.

Any other things for dads to know about post-delivery?

Much of the discussion about being socially responsible relates to corporations’ actions. (e.g. “What can this company do to improve its social responsibility?”)

But what about personal social responsibility? Why is that not a larger topic?

Here is a list of some things I see as what a socially responsible person does. I will attempt to instill these in my children as parts of a civilized society. This is just what people are supposed to do. These are not necessarily rules, but I know I would rather live in a community where these were practiced more often than not.

• Look at the person to whom you are speaking
• Cover your mouth when coughing or sneezing
• Offer your chair to the elderly (or to a lady if you’re a gentleman)
• Address elders as Mr., Mrs., or Sir, Ma’am
• Say please, thank you, and you’re welcome
• Use a salutation or valediction when meeting or departing from someone (say hello or good-bye)
• Be able to apologize
• Chew with your mouth closed
• Say excuse me when appropriate
• Hold doors open for others
• Find the end of the line and wait in it
• Watch your language
• Ladies should be served before gentlemen
• Offer to help if you see someone in need

In the old days, these things were known as manners or maybe even common courtesy. I guess they fell out of favor and need a new buzzword (i.e. social responsibility) to become popular again.

Not a very catchy title, I know, but I was going for accuracy rather than cleverness.

This post doesn’t need much in the way of introduction, other than to say we visited some friends for dinner and these photos are from their yard.

Apple Tree

Apple Blossoms

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A while back I overheard my wife say something to herself along the lines of “cross her off the list.” My curiosity got the better of me, so I asked what list she was talking about.

Hey, inquiring minds want to know.

It was the list of good future spouse candidates for me, should something happen to my wife and death did us part.

Those of you who know my wife are not surprised, because she likes to plan. Reference 1: her request that she be cremated and turned into a diamond.

Now for those of you who are husbands, I have some tips for you. Before you go ask your wives about the list, finish reading this post.

DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT

• inquire about the list – it is for the wife’s contemplation only. She is just making sure that her family can be taken care of in her absence.
• ask to see the list – it is in the wife’s head only. And subject to revision.
• ask who is on the list – no good can come from that. And there’s really no good time to ask that question.
• make suggestions to add to the list – that’s just asking for trouble. No further explanation needed.

I was married for several years before I knew my wife kept a list. I don’t know who is on the list. I don’t know what criteria my wife is using – my guess is that it’s related to cooking skills. She probably wants our kids to eat something other than macaroni and cheese or grilled cheese sandwiches.

And no, I don’t have a similar list for my whom my wife could marry should she become a widow. I thought about thinking about it once, but I bought life insurance instead.

Sorry, Canada – this post has nothing to do with Christmas.

My wife and I are similar in that we like to pile things up and take care of them later. This has a drawback in that, if one waits too long, the pile can become overwhelming. (Don’t even ask about the ironing.)

For example, we separate our cardboard boxes from the rest of the garbage because that’s what the recyclers want. Plus I have to break down and fold the boxes anyway because they’re too bulky for the normal trash can. Once I have to break it down, it doesn’t cost me any extra to place it in one bin versus the other.

But so that I’m not inconvenienced any time I empty a box, I just toss the boxes into a pile (in the garage, usually) and break them all down at once (when I can’t walk through the garage anymore, usually). Sometimes I do rethink this method.
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Welcome back to another edition of Husbands and Wives. In today’s episode, we will explore how each party handles children who are at risk of injury.

Case #1: The Bunk Bed

Parent A: “The kids are jumping off the top bunk and landing on the mattress on the floor.”
Parent B: “Yeah, I told them no flips.”

Question: Which parent (A or B) is the husband and which is the wife?

Case #2: The Swingset

The scene: a playground. The dilemma: a child is swinging on the swingset and is contemplating an airborne exit. Both parents yell something to the child at the same time.
Parent A: “Don’t jump off!”
Parent B: “Land on your feet!”

Question: Which parent (A or B) is the husband and which is the wife?

Okay, we’re out of time for today. Remember to tune in next time to Some Blog Site for more Husbands and Wives!