Some Blog Site

A Letter to the Manufacturers of the Caps of Liquid Detergents

Note: detergent companies, it is a very important letter, so please read all the lines.

Hint: if you are not a manufacturer of detergent caps and you want to know what I wrote, highlight the text with your mouse (or finger if you’re using a smartphone/tablet – you may need to copy/paste it into an email in order to read it). Those manufacturers don’t need this hint because they obviously have no problem reading things with no contrast between the background and foreground colors.

Just in time for election season, here is a fruit and vegetable stand after the political groups’ PR firms adjusted the signs.

I suppose that we can call inanimate objects as we see them, because there is or was no agenda – just identification. How much of a person’s physical appearance are we allowed to use to identify him? Hair color is probably still okay, but skin color makes at least some people pause.

I think oranges are one of the safe items in that I can’t think of a politically-charged term to which a committee could change it.

I thought about including blackberries, but I’ll leave that as an exercise for you, the reader.

Related Note : Most of the black students at my college were from Jamaica. They were neither African nor American. Just by looking at someone as we passed in the hallway, I could not tell his national origin nor his citizenship. That’s why I prefer to call things, and people, as I see them.

And no people are the color of those potatoes, by the way, unless they are sunburned.

Parent Tip: Do not leave a toddler unattended with a banana. Or blueberries. Unless you like cleaning them out of upholstery.

Parent Tip: If you’re carrying a child on your back or shoulders and you accidentally cause a minor injury (e.g. he’s swinging his legs as you walk through a doorway and he knocks his ankle against the frame, or you take a turn a little too wide and bump his shoulder on the wall corner), just say “Ouch!” before he does. This happens occasionally with Gamma, and when I say “Ow!”, he will laugh and correct me with “No, that was me!” and then he will forget that he was supposed to be hurt.

Parent Tip: If your pre-schooler asks for a bowl of Lucky Charms, give him only a dozen pieces at a time. He can get the next dozen pieces after he has eaten all of the current pieces. If you don’t run breakfast this way, he will have had a bowl of marshmallows and you will be left with a bowl of plain cereal pieces.

It’s September, the start of the fall quarter. Time for me to update the theme on this blog.

As is usual, it’s not really a new theme – all I did was replace the images.

Anyway, here’s a slightly new look. Expect some tweaks in the days to come.

And if you don’t get it, here’s a link: Carcassonne by Rio Grande Games.

In a little-publicized press release, the NFL announced that teams who currently do not have cheerleading squads will be supplied with cheerleaders from the Recording Industry Association of America.

Transcript:
Cheerleader (offscreen): Rah! Rah! Sis-boom-bah!
Cheerleader (offscreen): Rah! Rah! Sis-boom-bah!
Lady Gaga (on a football field): Rah! Rah! Sis-boom-bah!
Lady Gaga: Caught in a bad romance
Ryan Seacrest: Looks like they went
Ryan Seacrest: Three and … OUT!

Introduction

In the normal course of events, I read about 2 books a year – whatever I can get through during our summer vacation.

This year, however, I made it through 7 books – 4 on vacation and 3 at home on whatever evenings I could manage.

But first, a disclaimer: I actually read over 100 books a year. But 99% of those are books that I am reading to the children and have read bunch of times before. They involve characters such as Papa, Mama, Brother, and Sister Bear. Or Little Critters. Or a Tank Engine. You get the idea.

My book reading started earlier this year. There was a book sale and my wife got Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief for Alpha. We had heard a little bit about the book but did not know if it would be appropriate for him to read, so I started reading it to gauge its content.

I was going to read a couple of chapters one evening, but when I finally looked at the clock it was after midnight and I was halfway through the book. I finished it a couple of nights later. It was very engaging. I do not oppose Alpha’s reading the book, but he’s not old enough yet. Maybe 6th grade. He’ll understand some more of the themes then, and the monsters might not be as frightening. Think about it – should a kid in elementary school be reading descriptions of the Underworld? How long would it take him to close his eyes that night?

We visited my sister and family not long after that. It turns out that my nephew has the whole Percy Jackson series – all 5 books – so he lent them to me for my vacation reading.
Read the rest of this entry »

[happy music]
Hello again everyone! Welcome to another episode of Hyphen-Man!

[suspenseful music]
Today’s case involves a box. A cereal box. See for yourselves:

Transcript – the box says:
Sweetened Whole Grain Oat Cereal
with a Naturally Yogurt Flavored Coating

Only Hyphen-Man can clear this mess!

Little does he suspect that the evil masterminds are trying to distract him by adding “ly” to words that don’t need it.

[faster suspenseful music]
“Naturally Yogurt?” he questions. “Yogurt is a noun – it shouldn’t be modified by an adverb!”

“Adjective-Man!” he calls. “I need your help!”

Hyphen-Man rushes to add a hyphen between Yogurt and Flavored while Adjective-Man arrives and starts removing the “ly”.

The trap worked! They continue their tasks, not realizing the words should have been rearranged first…

[commercial break]
Should it be “Natural Yogurt-Flavored Coating” or “Natural-Yogurt Flavored Coating” or “Naturally-Flavored Yogurt Coating”? Oh, the choices, the ambiguity, the tension!

Tune in next week, when Hyphen-Man fixes the phrase “Sweetened Whole Grain Oat Cereal”!