Helpful Pet

Some of you may recall that my wife and I like things that are no- or low-maintenance. That’s why I sold my lawn mower and pay the neighbor to mow my lawn.

There is an easier solution: have someone else do all the maintenance work.

Normally, that would entail hiring a handyman or some service. But it turns out that’s not necessary. There is a special breed of pet (a cat of course, because cats are better than dogs) that will handle all the work for you.

And you can get this pet at Costco.

Don’t believe me? Here’s a picture I took at our Costco:

picture of a bag of maintenance cat

It clearly says “Maintenance Cat”.

It also says “Super Premium”. Maybe the normal variety of maintenance cat is somewhat lazy and does sloppy work.

Just don’t view the full-size version to see the context.

then hear in heaven their prayer and their supplication, and maintain their cause.

1 Kings 8:45

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This little article thingy was written by Some Guy sometime around 6:51 am and has been carefully placed in the Ponder category.

5 Responses to “Helpful Pet”

  1. Burrill Says:

    Super Premium Maintenance Cat looks VERY serious about his work.

  2. Sally Says:

    Hate to tell you, but this is obviously a scam. No cat would ever lower himself to doing work of any kind, let alone maintenance work. I know this because I asked my cat, Maxwell, and he was shocked at the very idea. Perhaps it means that this cat is a “Premium Maintenance Cat” who requires premium maintenance at all times. Much more likely. :-)

  3. Some Guy Says:

    Just great…now what am I going to get to do the maintenance around here?

    I’m not going to trust a dog – he would be eager to help, but he wouldn’t have a clue what to do.
    And a ferret would be quite capable, but he would rather play (or pull pranks on us).
    Bird – not strong enough.
    Fish – no hands.
    I’m running out of options.

  4. Caitlin Says:

    How about a newt? You can make it do housework (though it would take a long time…) and quote Monty Python all at the same time!

  5. Ricky Anderson Says:

    She turned me into a newt!

    I got bettah.

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