Archive for April, 2011

Cherubim and Friends

This is somewhat related to last week’s comic.

comic of cherubim and seraphim using a serif font with angel wings


I’m pretty sure the sans-serifim were the one-third that fell with Lucifer.

Seraphim stood above Him, each having six wings: with two he covered his face, and with two he covered his feet, and with two he flew.

Isaiah 6:2

Husbands and Wives: The List

A while back I overheard my wife say something to herself along the lines of “cross her off the list.” My curiosity got the better of me, so I asked what list she was talking about.

Hey, inquiring minds want to know.

It was the list of good future spouse candidates for me, should something happen to my wife and death did us part.

Those of you who know my wife are not surprised, because she likes to plan. Reference 1: her request that she be cremated and turned into a diamond.

Now for those of you who are husbands, I have some tips for you. Before you go ask your wives about the list, finish reading this post.

DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT

  • inquire about the list – it is for the wife’s contemplation only. She is just making sure that her family can be taken care of in her absence.
  • ask to see the list – it is in the wife’s head only. And subject to revision.
  • ask who is on the list – no good can come from that. And there’s really no good time to ask that question.
  • make suggestions to add to the list – that’s just asking for trouble. No further explanation needed.

I was married for several years before I knew my wife kept a list. I don’t know who is on the list. I don’t know what criteria my wife is using – my guess is that it’s related to cooking skills. She probably wants our kids to eat something other than macaroni and cheese or grilled cheese sandwiches.

And no, I don’t have a similar list for my whom my wife could marry should she become a widow. I thought about thinking about it once, but I bought life insurance instead.

A wife is bound as long as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

1 Corinthians 7:39

More Sharkiness

Long-time readers of this blog may remember that Alpha’s bottom teeth did not go willingly. He had his baby teeth and adult teeth together for a while. In electrical terms, it’s similar to a make-before-break switch, as opposed to the normal break-before-make switch everyone else has.

It turned out that his top teeth have the same propensity.

picture of the top front adult teeth with baby teeth still

I hadn’t realized it before this happened, but I was looking forward to having a child with that adorable smile where the top two front teeth are missing. Sadly, I have been denied that stage.

There’s a Font for That

Click on the image to see a full-size version. It might be easier to read that way.

comic of a pun about sans-a-riff

And here is the transcript:
A: What are you typing?
B: a paper about songs without repeated short melodic phrases
A: You can’t do that. You’re doing it all wrong!
B: What? How?
A: You’re using Times New Roman font.
B: So?
A: You need a sans-a-riff font.

Note: alert readers will notice that I presented today’s pun in the form of a comic. And the pun was about a font without serifs. Therefore …

Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a burning coal in his hand, which he had taken from the altar with tongs.

Isaiah 6:6

April in the D

picture of corn skewers for corn on the cobThe temperature last week (10 days ago) reached in the 70s, with plenty of sun. We did break out the sunscreen, for me and for the kids. I had setup the trampoline, so everyone had fun outside.

With weather like that, we figured spring was here. I bought charcoal for the grill, and we were all set for good weather until October.

It snowed yesterday. Not just some-snowflakes-came-down snow, but had-to-clear-the-car-windows type of snow. We had right around an inch of accumulation.

Spring Game

Beta and I got free admission to a Michigan football game!

Of course, so did everyone else. It was the spring game – the final spring scrimmage – which is open to everyone.

I met my dad, brother, nephew, and a couple of my brother’s friends there. I didn’t plan my route very well and had to go right through the Stadium-Main St. intersection. That slowed me down, so I parked by Industrial with about ten minutes left before kickoff. Beta and I had to walk 4/5 of a mile to the Big House. I should add here that I had to wake Beta up at that the end of the car ride, so he was not going to be moving very quickly.

I decided that the only way we would make it in time was for me to carry him on my shoulders. I didn’t want to run, since I haven’t started my annual running season (Halloween to Easter is chocolate-eating season, Easter to Halloween is running season), so I walked as quickly as I could with a 37-pound weight on my shoulders.

We made it in the stadium a couple minutes after kickoff. And I was sweating. Everyone else had their winter coats on, since it was in the upper 40s, but I took mine off and was quite comfortable in my long-sleeved T-shirt, for about two or three possessions.

Once we sat down, we were at the 40-something yard line, 40-some rows up. Here’s the view from there (offense in blue, defense in white):

picture of the Michigan football spring game


No More Throwing

Bedtime Conversation

or, In which Alpha attempts to buy time in order not to fall asleep

Alpha: How many more days until Christmas?
Me: Let’s see 31 + 28 + 6 = 65. 365 – 65 = 300 – 6 = 294. So 294 days until Christmas
Alpha: Okay. I don’t like being surprised.

I hope that means he will plan well. Not just for Christmas, but life in general.

Updating Bible Verses

We have a CD from Awana with all the verses the kids are supposed to learn. Beta was going throughout his day singing one of the songs, and this was the result:

Beta: Do all things without complaining or computing.
Alpha: Beta, it’s not computing – it’s disputing.
Beta: Oh.
Beta: Do all things without complaining or computing.

We might just have to call it “close enough” and move on to the next verse.

Will They Ever Learn?

For this conversation, I’ll give you only my side and let you figure out what the boys said. Hint: one of them was crying and rubbing his head.

Me: Well, of course. If you play a game where you’re both throwing rocks, that’s going to happen.

You would think they would learn, but I had a very similar conversation about a week later:

Me: Well, maybe you two should stop playing a game where you throw Matchbox cars…

Eventually I’ll learn and just say “No throwing” so that there are no more loopholes.

Do all things without complaining or disputing.

Philippians 2:14